“I can’t wait to sleep in my own bed!” Maria said as she climbed out of the airport shuttle.

“I bet!” Tina said passing through the door as the driver closed the door as he hurried to the trunk.

“Uh, I’m sure you can’t,” he said awkwardly.

“What?” she turned and looked at him, then at Tina. “Oh! Sorry! I, uh, think out loud sometimes.”

“Busted,” Tina snickered.

Maria opened the front door and walked inside and stopped and stared at the tall dark-haired stranger in her living room. He stood up from the couch and stood wide-eyed.

“That guy is going to tell that story about you talking to yourself for months! Oh, hello!” Tina stopped short behind Maria.

“Uh… hi?” the man stammered.

“Honey, is that you?” Martin called from the kitchen. He stepped into the living room drying his hands on a dish towel. “Sorry, I didn’t hear you I was feeding Chris— Oh…”

Maria stared at the young man. The young man stared at Maria. Martin stared at the two of them.

“Well, this is weird,” Tina said with a nervous laugh. “Martin? Did you pick up a stray while we were gone?”

“You’re dead,” Maria stated.

“Umm… Yeah, so I’ve been told. But you can see me, too?”

“Yeah, which is weird in itself…”

“That is weird,” Tina agreed, nodding.

“Sorry, honey, I forgot to tell you… Samuel,” he started introductions, “This is my wife, Maria. Maria, this is Samuel.”

“Pleased to meet you, ma’am.”

“Pleased to meet you, too,” Maria replied. “Umm, Martin… how’d this happen?”

“Which part?”

“Oh, I don’t know, let’s start with the ghost in the living room.”

“Uh, Sis, technically there are two ghosts in the living room,” Tina corrected. Maria stared daggers at Tina who said, “You know, this ghost will just stand back here if you need me…”

“Thursday, Antony and I were responding to a 10-57…”

“Hit and run,” Tina interjected. Maria looked at her sideways. “What? I pay attention!”

“Right, hit and run over on Crenshaw.”

“I was crossing the street,” Samuel said. “Next thing I know…” he gestured to his slightly translucent body.

“Speeding Mercedes didn’t even slow down for the red light. Hit Samuel here, lost control and crashed into a light pole. Both Samuel and the driver were deceased when we rolled up.”

“I… I didn’t know what was happening. I’m walking and then I hear a crash and then… I’m looking at the crumpled car and this just… obliterated body that was… me. I freaked out.”

“I get it,” Tina nodded compassionately.

“No one saw me, no one was responding to me, I didn’t know what was going on… And then I saw that your husband was looking at me. At me, not through me like everyone else.”

“And you… followed him home?” Maria asked.

“Aww, like I said, picking up a stray!”

“Who are you?” Samuel asked Tina.

She pointed at Maria, “Her sister. Tina. I’ve been dead a long time. It’s all good. Well, I mean, not good. Nothing about being dead is good, am I right?” He stared at her wordlessly. “Okay, tough crowd… Maria?”

“I mean, I think what my sister was inelegantly trying to ask was, why are you here?”

“I… I don’t know.”

“Presumably the driver didn’t stick around… wait,” she turned to Martin, “Did he?”

“She,” Martin corrected. “And no. That was a weird thing, too. When we rolled up I saw Samuel here standing around confused, and I saw the ghost of the driver talking to a tall wiry man in a long, white, billowy robe… then they both disappeared but Samuel here… well, you can see he’s still here.”

“I get that you can see him. You see all the ghosts – Tina, too, of course. But why can I see him? We were just in the most haunted city in the country, and I never even got to see the woman my sister made out with!”

“Maria!” Tina scolded. “We didn’t ‘make out’!”

“Oh, you didn’t?”

“I mean…” Tina’s face turned beet red as she smiled shyly. “Well, you didn’t need to tell anyone about it!”

“I don’t know why you can see me. Other than your husband, you seem to be the only other person–”

Tina cleared her throat.

“Uh, the only other living person,” he amended, “who can see me.”

“Do you have any family? A wife? Parents?”

“I don’t, no. My folks died years ago. I was in a relationship a few years ago, but I only recently moved to the Valley. I honestly don’t know anyone out here.”

“Well,” Tina started, “You know us now.” She caught Maria’s eye and nodded imperceptibly. “Come on, I’ll show you around.” She turned and let out a little laugh. “It’s funny, actually, Maria and I have gone on a bunch of Ghost Tours lately. Now I’m sort of giving one!” Samuel followed Tina up the stairs.

When they were presumably out of earshot, Maria moved closer to Martin. “Well, that’s weird!”

“No kidding,” Martin replied. “I’m usually good at getting ghosts to leave me alone, but he just looked so… lost.”

“I can see that,” Maria said looking up to where Tina and Samuel had disappeared.

“Sounds like you guys had fun!”

“Oh, man, it was a blast,” she said. “I might have drank a little bit…” she put her hands to her temples.

“You? Drink? In New Orleans? That’s crazy! And Tina made out with a ghost?!”

“She didn’t give many details, but it sounds like it was… something,” she waggled her eyebrows.

“Wow, that’s great!”

“Yeah, she really let herself go and had a good time. I mean, we both did, but I was really glad she was able to have fun on her own, you know?”

“I do. And, if I’m honest, I’m really glad you’re both back! I really didn’t know what to do with Samuel. Communicating with him is one thing, but… I mean… I don’t know what to do! We watched the Dodger game, he’s made faces at Christy while I fed her, but, I mean, there’s only so much I can do with a ghost I’ve just met.

“We’ll see if Tina has any insight.”

They were both quiet for a few moments until rapid knocking came from the front door. It sounded like not one but two people knocking.

“What the?” Martin asked, trading a quizzical look with Maria before stepping to the door and opening it.

In front of them stood two identical men. Well, they had identical features – neatly trimmed black hair, clean shaven faces, the same blue eyes – but one was dressed in a white three-piece suit while the other sported a scarlet red three piece suit.

“What the hell?” Maria asked stepping up behind Martin.

“Hello,” they both said at the same time. “I’m–” they started at the same time, stopped and looked at each other in frustration then started talking over each other again.

“Stop!” Martin said with what Maria thought of as his “cop voice.” “Who are you?” When they both opened their mouths to speak at the same time again, he held up a hand. “One at a time. You,” he pointed to the man in white, “Who are you?”

The man in the white suit gave the red suited man a self-satisfied look before starting, “We’re, well, we’re here from the afterlife.”

“Well, you are,” the man in red said. “I’m from,” he looked towards the ground, “Uh, places south,” he winked.

“We’re here for Samuel,” the man in white said. “We believe he’s here.”

“Well,” Maria said, “this is awkward…”

There isn’t a part 4, don’t worry. I’m leaving this one a little open-ended. It’s entirely possible we’ll revisit Maria and Tina and now Samuel later this month.

I’ll be honest, I kind of thought this might be a 3-parter. It’s fun to have Maria and Tina hanging out together, so I’m not going to apologize! And here we have the sisters in the most haunted city in America…

“I’m just sayin’” Maria slurred just a little bit, took a sip of her third Sazerac, then continued, “We’ve been on the The Ghosts of New Orleans Tour, the Ghost and Vampire Walking Tour, and the Voodoo & Cemetery Tour and we’ve learned exactly two things — I mean, you know, aside from all the haunted shit and murders and stuff… Two things,” she held up two fingers to enumerate her points. “One, you are shit at making small talk with ghosts. And, two, my feet are killing me! You’re lucky you’re dead!”

“I’m surprised you can even still feel your feet with as you’ve drank!”

“Hey!” Maria said, “Just because you can’t drink–”

“Who are you talking to?” interrupted a man wearing an unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt staring at the empty barstool next to Maria.

Maria opened her mouth to retort but was cut off by “She’s talking to her dead sister!” It was the bartender with the short blonde hair, numerous piercings and gorgeous sleeve tattoos on both her arms. The man was about to say something but the bartender cut him off, “give her some peace!” The Hawaiian shirt guy looked taken aback and walked away.

“Thank you!” Maria said to the bartender. “You get it!”

“I’ve got you, girl,” she said to Maria. “I’m Kati,” she said. “Let me know if you need another round.” As she stepped away to help another customer Tina made eye contact with her and Kati winked.

“Oh my god, Maria! She just winked at me! I think she can see me! She’s really cute!”

“Slow down there, girl,” Maria said. “She’s way too alive for you!”

Tina sighed. “Oh, to your point about me not making small talk, you know I’m naturally shy! And what am I supposed to say to a ghost that’s been dead since the eighteenth century? ‘Hey, how’s it going? Want to go for a buggy ride?’”

“I mean,” Maria said, “It’s a good first step… But you’re seeing ghosts around, right?”

“Holy crap, M, this town is packed to the gills with ghosts! It’s like 2-1 ghosts to the living in this bar alone!”

“I mean, this place has been here for like two hundred years… I mean, you wouldn’t go into Lafitte’s Blacksmith Shop.”

“Oh, hell no!” Tina blanched. “There are so many ghosts in there I’d be all pressed up like that rave you didn’t tell mom and dad about when you were like 16.”

“Our secret!” Maria said. “Still, though, you haven’t spoken to any of them!”

“Seriously, sis, you have no idea about age difference!”

Maria rolled her eyes and downed the last of her drink.

“You good?” Kati asked pointing at Maria’s now-empty glass.

“Yeah,” she said and settled up her tab.

“You girls have a good night!” Kati said. “Don’t be strangers!” When Tina thought she might swoon because the cute bartender addressed both of them Kati said directly to Tina, “Keep her safe, okay?” Maria was already halfway out the bar but had to come back to get her sister who had gone all moon-eyed.

Out on the street Maria was grateful for the cool air that took the edge off her growing inebriation.

“Are you going to call a Lyft?” Tina asked.

“You know, I think I’ll walk,” she said. “Ooh, wanna get beignets?”

Tina nodded, smiling. She was glad her sister was having a good time. As they walked past Jackson square, Tina asked, “Are Martin and Christy doing okay?”

“Oh yeah,” Maria said. “When I called him earlier, he was loving his father-daughter time.”

Tina nodded at a tall ghost with striking blue eyes they passed.

“Good evening,” he said with a thick New Orleans accent as he tipped his felt hat.

“Good evening to you!” Tina stood blushing as the man smiled broadly and continued down St Peter.

“Did you say something?” Maria asked a few steps ahead.

Tina hurried to catch up, “Just saying hi to a cute ghost.”

“Atta girl, T! Way to go!” Maria said grinning. “Boy ghost or girl ghost?”

“Boy, err, man ghost. You have to ask?”

“Our bartender Kati seemed like she made your knees weak. I’m just saying!”

At Café Du Monde, Tina made small talk with the ghosts of two soldiers who said they died at the battle of New Orleans while Maria listened to Tina’s side of the conversation as she tried eat the pastries without covering herself in powdered sugar.

They were walking down Royal towards their Airbnb on Elysian Fields when Tina stopped suddenly in front of a three-story stone building.

“Weren’t we here earlier?” Maria asked.

“Yeah,” Tina said quietly. “It’s the LaLaurie Mansion.”

“Oh,” Maria said casually, then, as she remembered the terrible history that transpired there she said more gravely, “Oh!”

“Yeah.”

“Who’s here?”

“The slaves. They’re upstairs. I can hear them.” She let the tears that had welled up run down her cheeks.

“Delphine LaLaurie?”

“Uh huh,” she said with a touch of anger. “Part of me wants to go in there and smack the shit out of her,” she said balling her fists.

“But?”

“She’s… it’s hard to explain… she’s a ghost, but she’s… not. She’s more like… evil in a ghost suit. Super scary, even to me.” She looked up at the scared faces staring out of the third story windows and shuddered.

“It’s hard, isn’t it?” a creole woman in a nineteenth century dress said from behind her.

“I’ve…. I’ve never experienced anything like it,” Tina said.

“Well,” she smiled sadly, “fortunately there’s not a lot of places where things this terrible took place. The way Delphine LaLaurie tortured those poor people…” She shook her head.

“I’m Tina,” Tina said, admiring the woman.

“Pleased to meet you, Tina. I’m Edmée.”

“Edmée,” Tina said, rolling the name around her mouth. “That’s really beautiful!”

“Thank you,” Edmée smiled at her. Tina really liked her smile.

“Oh,” Maria said. “Do I need to let you and this Edmée have a little alone time?”

“Don’t mind my sister,” Tina said to Edmée.

“It’s sweet you two have each other.”

Maria didn’t think she’d ever seen her sister smile as broadly as she was right now at whoever this Edmée was. It warmed her heart. “I’m going to head back to the house,” she said. “Take your time.”

“Thanks, Maria,” Tina said without turning.

“Would you like to walk by the river?” Edmée asked.

“I really would…” Tina said and without thinking took Edmée’s hand and the two ghosts started for the Mississippi.

To be continued…

Time got away from me tonight. And while I’m excited to bring back some characters from years past, I also want to make sure I don’t rush their story. So, this is a little introduction to their trip across the country!

“Do we have anyone who has any psychic ability with the group tonight?” Cody, the tour guide, asked enthusiastically.

A woman dressed in head to toe black with a wide brimmed black hat complete with black veil shyly raised her black-gloved hand.

“That’s fantastic!” Cody said and you could tell he meant it. “What is your name, ma’am?”

“Dawn,” she said softly from under her veil.

“Alright, Dawn,” Cody nodded enthusiastically. “Well, if we encounter any spirits on this tour please don’t hesitate to point them out to the rest of the group!”

“Fat chance,” Tina said out of the side of her mouth to Maria. “We’ve been here, what, twenty minutes and the voodoo queen over there hasn’t so much as raised an eyebrow at me!” She waved in the woman in black’s direction. “Hey! Anne Rice! Over here!”

Maria fought the urge to laugh and she covered it by leaning in to the stroller as if she were attending to baby Christy.

“Before we get started,” Cody turned in their direction, “I just want to make sure your baby is going to be okay on this tour. I mean, we’re going to be visiting some haunted Hollywood sights!” Cody really worked the “haunted Hollywood sights” bit.

“Oh, her?” Maria asked. “Yeah, she’s… yeah, she’s seen more than her fair share of ghosts already.”

“World’s best dead babysitter!” Tina crowed loudly. “Right here, people!”

Christy let out an adorable baby giggle at Tina’s antics.

“Great, then, let’s get started. Let’s go this way,” Cody started the tour down the sidewalk.

“Why are we here again?” Tina asked as they walked.

“To see if there are any ghosts out here,” Maria said simply. Too simply.

Tina stared at her sister suspiciously. “No…. no, that’s not it,” she said as they walked. “What’s your real motive here, sis? I mean, Martin was way too enthusiastic for us to go on this ghost tour. And now you just want to see if you can find ghosts? No, I don’t buy it.”

Maria sighed and stopped with the stroller until the crowd had moved sufficiently down the block before she said quietly, “Fine. Martin and I thought maybe if we went on this ghost tour… I don’t know… maybe you might… you know…”

“No, I don’t know.”

“Maybe you might meet someone yourself.”

Tina gaped at her sister. When she stood long enough that Maria started to squirm a little, Tina burst out in laughter. “Dios mio, sis! That’s hilarious! Meet another ghost on a ghost tour! Even in death you can’t help trying to set me up!!”